Could I Love Cooking Again?

The simple, silly one-pot dinner that reminded me why I ever loved to cook.

Tonight, sitting in our Casita travel trailer at a tiny little table, I found myself smiling in a way I hadn’t for years.

There I was, chopping vegetables with my old chef’s knife, steam rising from a pot on our little Coleman propane stove, and the dish I was making couldn’t have been simpler. In fact, it felt almost laughable, given some of the elaborate meals I’ve cooked in my life.

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Our trailer isn’t exactly a chef’s dream kitchen.

We don’t have much room, just a small refrigerator, a two-burner cooktop, a sink, and a little bit of storage. So, if we’re away for more than a couple of days, it takes some planning to come up with meals that call for minimal ingredients and don’t make a big mess.

The five-star campsite kitchen. No galley crew, just me, my husband, our dog, and the occasional raccoon food critic.

We often cook outside instead of on the cooktop inside the Casita. No need for dinner smells to hang around in our tiny space hours before bed, which sits just steps away from the stove. Maybe that’s part of the charm: fresh air, one pot, and no fuss.

I think it could be that back-to-basics feeling, no pressure to perform, no fancy plating, no risk of someone picking apart my work, that kept me from slipping into all the old feelings that cooking usually stirs up for me.

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Truth is, for years, the minute I’d pick up a knife or even think about cooking, a flood of dread would hit me.

For about 15 years, cooking was my career, my entire world.

For twelve of those years, I worked as a chef for billionaires on their private and chartered yachts. My first job in that world came about a year after culinary school.

Back then, I’d built a successful catering company, until the economy crashed around 2005 and the work dried up almost overnight.

At the same time, I was teaching at a great cooking school, a job I loved but didn’t come close to paying the bills.

Mortgage payments, child support, utilities, food, tuition, the numbers didn’t add up. I fell behind. My house went into foreclosure.

And then, right when things felt hopeless, an opportunity came along to cook for the ultra-wealthy, travel the world on luxury yachts, and have zero living expenses.

Back when I thought cooking on the high seas for millionaires was the dream. Spoiler: sometimes it’s not the view that needs fixing, it’s the job.

Who wouldn’t jump at that? I got paid to do what I loved while sailing to places I’d only dreamed of.

But as life goes, things aren’t always what you expect. Working on yachts is demanding in ways that few people understand.

I was the only chef, cooking for up to twelve guests and twelve crew members, all with different menus, diets, and expectations. Some were gracious. Many were not.

The stress and relentless pressure slowly ate away at my passion.

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Even though people always praised my food, deep down I’d wonder: Is this going to be the time I fail miserably? Is this the meal that makes someone say they hated what I made for them?

I realize now that much of that was self-inflicted trauma, but the stakes were always high, and my own mind often got the best of me.

Slowly, the thing that had once been my greatest joy became the thing I couldn’t stand to face.

But tonight, stirring a pot of the simplest stew I could think of, none of that showed up.

No fear of failure, no anxiety about being good enough. Just me, a knife, and food made with care for the man I love.

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I thought I’d share what I made so you can see just how simple it was, and maybe why it brought me so much unexpected peace.

One-Pot Veggie & Sausage Stew Why it works: hearty, healthy, and easy, plus only one pot to clean.

Ingredients I used tonight (in the order they go in):

• Olive oil

• Onion, diced

• Carrots, diced

• Celery, diced

• Dried thyme

• Raw Italian chicken sausage, removed from its casings

• Small gourmet potatoes (the kind that come in a mesh bag near the fingerlings), halved for bite-sized pieces

• 1 carton ginger turmeric broth

• Chopped kale

• Salt and pepper to taste

How I cooked it: I heated a splash of olive oil in my cast iron pot (outside, of course) and sautéed the diced onion first, then added the carrots and celery, letting them soften together. I sprinkled in the dried thyme at this stage, giving it time to bloom with the veggies. Next, I crumbled in the raw Italian chicken sausage, breaking it apart as it browned.

Once the sausage was cooked through, I added the halved potatoes and poured in the ginger turmeric broth. I let everything simmer until the potatoes were fork-tender. Finally, I stirred in the chopped kale and let it bubble away, partially uncovered, so the broth could reduce a bit and the flavors could come together. A pinch of salt and pepper to finish, and that was it.

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Simple, humble, but tonight, this little pot of stew reminded me that cooking doesn’t always have to be about perfection or performance.

Sometimes, the simplest meal, made with love under the stars, is what heals old wounds and brings you back to yourself, one bite at a time.

— R. Michael

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