I TOTALLY understand your feelings with this. Those items are NOT just “things”, they are filled with happy memories, moments in time, stability. They’ve been in every chapter of your story, your growth. They’ve become a part of YOU, so letting go of these, is like losing a piece of you. I mean, correct me if I’m wrong, but that’s what “things” in my kitchen/ home represent to me. I know the process is hard, but I also know how strong you are and that everything WILL be ok.
For me, I look at all my “things” and how I’ve cared for them, kept them running, protected them and the thought of them going to an unknown place, definitely makes me feel uneasy. ❤️
Sell the Kitchen Aid last. And if I were in your place, I'd write about the adventures you've had with it. Not giant adventures, just remembering things you've made, successes and failures, etc.
The liminal space. I can't speak to ADHD, but I can speak from the perspective of sensory processing sensitivity. Those who are sensitive across different spectrum, we get it.
My husband and I lived in Florida for 14 years and we also get that. lol
I often think of this liminal space as a trapeze artist. You let go of the last bar and you're sailing through the air holding your breath waiting to catch the next bar.
What if you had a really good friend who would take 10 specific items that represent safety for you ...and agree to come get them on the day you're leaving ...and disperse them for you? That way, those anchors of safety could be with you for the larger duration of the time. Just a thought.
Our brains are trying to protect us, and sometimes we have to care for them as we were children. Or your puppy.
As a recovering ex-Yank living in Oz since 2007 (and an AuDHDer), I get it. And yeah, the 'different power point' thing made for a major gadget-dumping (my *perfect* stereo system!) when I accompanied my Aussie born-n-raised, homesick partner (soon to be husband) across the Pacific from SF to Sydney.
But ... maybe it's the passage of time, my move being nearly two decades ago, and yours being a fresh, ongoing stressor - with change will come new gadgets (with appropriate plugging) that will be 'yours' sooner than you think, as they become part of your love for Australia. And when times comes that those once-new things need replacement, similar feelings might arise.
The little changes are often harder than the big ones: just yesterday I did a big clearing out the pile of old shoes in the closet I know I'll never wear again, but such meaning and memory is attached to each of them - tossing them on the 'to donate' pile was heart-rending (even as I swept off years of accumulated dust-bunnies from so many long-untouched ones).
New things await you that will take on deep personal meaning. Sadly, sometimes it means clearing the decks to make room for their arrival into your life.
It sounds like you have friends and (partner's) family waiting for you here; that should hopefully soften the landing and feelings of disruption. I hope you come to love living in Australia - at least in comparison to anywhere else - as much as I have. It's a good place to settle into and call home.
Not sure where you're landing in Oz, but if it's Sydney, and you need a fellow once-USian to lend an understanding ear to whatever you need to get off your chest, let me know.
This week I’ve started culling things that I can’t see. Cabinets and drawers. Things I don’t have any reason to ever think about. Gotta start somewhere.
My husband grew up on the Gold Coast. We’re going to settle there with his father at first. Eventually, I would love to end up in Melbourne. It feels a lot like Portland to me.
My husband and i also sold our red Kitchenaid in the early stages of moving from Phoenix to Phillip Island (near Melbourne). It turned out to be one of the easier decisions along the way.
The big decision was what we needed to do about Diggers, our now 11 year old lab. We brought him with us.
If Chase is coming with you I'd encourage you to get onto that as soon as possible. It's a long process. Very long. But if done correctly it will mean only 10 days in quarantine. We missed a step and Diggers was in for 30 days. (Sounds like a prison sentence)
Oh my gosh!! I totally understand. Steve (husband) and I moved from north FL to OR in November. Sold most of our belongings. Unlike you, my beloved Kitchenaid went in a box for storage. I use it and it will bring me comfort wherever we land next.
I find it’s the time ‘in between’ that’s the hardest. As a result I tend to rip into packing and discarding. We emptied and sold the house in 2 weeks and left on our journey. I envy you having in-laws in Oz. Fabulous place. Enjoy. Maybe you’ll start cooking again!!
Haha. I'm grateful for my Australian family and looking forward to our life on the Gold Coast. I'm sure you and Brent have spent time in Oz, but my husband is a wonderful tour guide. Next time you make your way there, let us know.
Sold my KitchenAid to someone in our building. She was really nice. She let me share some history. I had an emotional moment walking back to my apartment. But I feel better now, and I learned a lot about myself from the experience.
Hello David. We got Chase started a few months ago. He's approved for the 10-day quarantine. Flights for all of us booked for end of August. I think his immigration was more complicated and expensive than mine! Are you and your husband still at Phillip Island? I've not heard of it, but I'm sure my husband has. Out of the cities I've been to so far, Melbourne is by far my favorite. I'm hoping we can eventually settle near there.
I TOTALLY understand your feelings with this. Those items are NOT just “things”, they are filled with happy memories, moments in time, stability. They’ve been in every chapter of your story, your growth. They’ve become a part of YOU, so letting go of these, is like losing a piece of you. I mean, correct me if I’m wrong, but that’s what “things” in my kitchen/ home represent to me. I know the process is hard, but I also know how strong you are and that everything WILL be ok.
For me, I look at all my “things” and how I’ve cared for them, kept them running, protected them and the thought of them going to an unknown place, definitely makes me feel uneasy. ❤️
Sell the Kitchen Aid last. And if I were in your place, I'd write about the adventures you've had with it. Not giant adventures, just remembering things you've made, successes and failures, etc.
You can do this, really you can!
The liminal space. I can't speak to ADHD, but I can speak from the perspective of sensory processing sensitivity. Those who are sensitive across different spectrum, we get it.
My husband and I lived in Florida for 14 years and we also get that. lol
I often think of this liminal space as a trapeze artist. You let go of the last bar and you're sailing through the air holding your breath waiting to catch the next bar.
What if you had a really good friend who would take 10 specific items that represent safety for you ...and agree to come get them on the day you're leaving ...and disperse them for you? That way, those anchors of safety could be with you for the larger duration of the time. Just a thought.
Our brains are trying to protect us, and sometimes we have to care for them as we were children. Or your puppy.
As a recovering ex-Yank living in Oz since 2007 (and an AuDHDer), I get it. And yeah, the 'different power point' thing made for a major gadget-dumping (my *perfect* stereo system!) when I accompanied my Aussie born-n-raised, homesick partner (soon to be husband) across the Pacific from SF to Sydney.
But ... maybe it's the passage of time, my move being nearly two decades ago, and yours being a fresh, ongoing stressor - with change will come new gadgets (with appropriate plugging) that will be 'yours' sooner than you think, as they become part of your love for Australia. And when times comes that those once-new things need replacement, similar feelings might arise.
The little changes are often harder than the big ones: just yesterday I did a big clearing out the pile of old shoes in the closet I know I'll never wear again, but such meaning and memory is attached to each of them - tossing them on the 'to donate' pile was heart-rending (even as I swept off years of accumulated dust-bunnies from so many long-untouched ones).
New things await you that will take on deep personal meaning. Sadly, sometimes it means clearing the decks to make room for their arrival into your life.
It sounds like you have friends and (partner's) family waiting for you here; that should hopefully soften the landing and feelings of disruption. I hope you come to love living in Australia - at least in comparison to anywhere else - as much as I have. It's a good place to settle into and call home.
Not sure where you're landing in Oz, but if it's Sydney, and you need a fellow once-USian to lend an understanding ear to whatever you need to get off your chest, let me know.
- Yuri
This week I’ve started culling things that I can’t see. Cabinets and drawers. Things I don’t have any reason to ever think about. Gotta start somewhere.
My husband grew up on the Gold Coast. We’re going to settle there with his father at first. Eventually, I would love to end up in Melbourne. It feels a lot like Portland to me.
Thank you for your kind and supportive words.
—R. Michael
My husband and i also sold our red Kitchenaid in the early stages of moving from Phoenix to Phillip Island (near Melbourne). It turned out to be one of the easier decisions along the way.
The big decision was what we needed to do about Diggers, our now 11 year old lab. We brought him with us.
If Chase is coming with you I'd encourage you to get onto that as soon as possible. It's a long process. Very long. But if done correctly it will mean only 10 days in quarantine. We missed a step and Diggers was in for 30 days. (Sounds like a prison sentence)
https://www.agriculture.gov.au/biosecurity-trade/cats-dogs
All the best on your relocation.
Oh my gosh!! I totally understand. Steve (husband) and I moved from north FL to OR in November. Sold most of our belongings. Unlike you, my beloved Kitchenaid went in a box for storage. I use it and it will bring me comfort wherever we land next.
I find it’s the time ‘in between’ that’s the hardest. As a result I tend to rip into packing and discarding. We emptied and sold the house in 2 weeks and left on our journey. I envy you having in-laws in Oz. Fabulous place. Enjoy. Maybe you’ll start cooking again!!
You've been on a similar journey! That's amazing. Not sure about the cooking, but if I do, Substack will likely be one of the first places I share it.
Australia! Jealous!
Haha. I'm grateful for my Australian family and looking forward to our life on the Gold Coast. I'm sure you and Brent have spent time in Oz, but my husband is a wonderful tour guide. Next time you make your way there, let us know.
In addition to visiting twice, I’ve actually lived there twice, including once in Brisbane!
A drink or coffee on your next visit then! Brisbane is a great city.
Sold my KitchenAid to someone in our building. She was really nice. She let me share some history. I had an emotional moment walking back to my apartment. But I feel better now, and I learned a lot about myself from the experience.
Hello David. We got Chase started a few months ago. He's approved for the 10-day quarantine. Flights for all of us booked for end of August. I think his immigration was more complicated and expensive than mine! Are you and your husband still at Phillip Island? I've not heard of it, but I'm sure my husband has. Out of the cities I've been to so far, Melbourne is by far my favorite. I'm hoping we can eventually settle near there.